Dmitriy Osmerkin

I’ve got a very responsible job, because the movies I choose must be popular, have high TV ratings and keep up with whatever other channels have to offer.

Sometimes I have to air movies that I personally don’t like, but that’s my job. You just have to switch off your tastefulness and turn to the experience you’ve gained throughout all these years.

When I was a kid, I had a friend that we used to play computer games with like crazy. Maybe, at that moment I was already going a little bit cuckoo (laughs). I would go outside in the middle of winter, grab some snow and press it to my head.

There’s this craving I tend to get all the time, to blow something up, to kill someone and to change something in this world.

When I was about eighteen, I used to be a rebel. Nowadays, I’ve buried my alter ego deep under all sorts of material things, as this world is forcing me to readjust myself. But just some two-three years ago I was very much like Patrick Bateman, the character of the book “American Psycho”.

People use drugs and alcohol because they’re bored, they want to relax. But one thing about it is that when trying to relax like that we actually strain ourselves a lot. But, unfortunately, there’s no manual called “The right way to use…” for anything.

For me the Heart of everything is my mother and my girlfriend, who’s been putting up with me for five years. I’m at war with the world, the environment, the society, but I can only find real peace when I am with these two people.

Girls like cool guys and it’s meant to be that way. These are the rules of natural selection: the female chooses the strongest male. Take away everyone’s money, and chicks will start marrying bodybuilders, the men who will be able to pick up a stick, kill an animal and feed her and her children. That’s why in the modern world you have to emphasize your status. Although I prefer not to.

The other day, a friend of mine brought me a book by Osho, and I experienced one of the most wonderful feelings in my life: I ceased my war with the world, I forgave everyone everything there was to forgive, I even changed the way I walk, I slowed down. I started feeling so great, but everyone else was dumbstruck: ‘What’s wrong with you?’ I started saying things like: ‘People! The world is so beautiful, look around, the birds are singing!’ But the friends, who knew me being mean and nasty, would only say: ‘Bring the normal him back now!’

Nowadays, I can just ride my bicycle and chat with normal people, but before that I really used to hate everybody. I want to find harmony within myself, get to understand, what I really need in life, figure out what my main priorities are. For now, I realized that it’s my family, my loved ones, my friends. But I also need to realize what my next step should be.

My dreams and ambitions stop me from simply resting on my laurels, settling for a good salary and just being happy with it. I long for self-fulfilment, I want to become a Michael Jackson, or a great actor or something.
Books are an amazing thing. Just imagine, all those authors not only experienced all those emotions, but also had enough talent to write about it. When you read, you realize that you’re not alone, like, you realize that loneliness is not only your problem. Everyone else is stuck with the same thing.

I’m very unlucky: I get these really decent girls, and I have to force them into accepting money while I’m trying to give them a bit of a hint, like: ‘I think you should go buy yourself a dress or some new shoes, maybe’. And these modest girls go and buy some cheap stuff. And I want a girl to be fashionable, to be stylish.

Life’s so easy for dumb people. I even used to envy them at one stage. You sit there and self-reflect, analyzing everything you’ve done: whether it was right or wrong. And they just keep going. When the green light comes on, they push the accelerator. And with me it’s more like: the green light comes on, and I still park there looking around, checking if there’re any lunatics trying to drive through.

I’m a Libra, but, unfortunately, Libra doesn’t mean balance. It means that you’re constantly feeling torn apart.